MLK, JFK, and RFK. You know what these three heroes all had in common? They were all assassinated, all abbreviated into three letters, and they all reportedly cheated on their wives.

Even for those fellas who haven’t been married yet (stay strong, brothers), if you do, chances are you’ll subsequently get divorced. Statistics are in that favor. (Congratulations to all you ex-husbands! Welcome to the largest club in America!)

Mick Jagger, Prince Charles, Elvis, Picasso—they all did it. Charlie Chaplin had four wives and knocked up a 16-year-old; Einstein had ten mistresses and discovered the theory of relativity during breaks!

Adultery can also unite us politically. It’s a non-partisan issue; elected officials from both sides support it.

Democrat? Hey, man, look no further than John Edwards or Elliot “Client #9” Spitzer or Gary “Hart on” Hart or James “Bi-Bye” McGreevey or Bill “Bill Clinton” Clinton. Hell, weren’t both big Kennedy bros getting with Marilyn Monroe? Sounds like a porno from Karl Rove’s wet dreams.

Republican? We got Warren G. Hard-on, Larry “Not Gay” Craig, Newt “Staffer-Stuffing” Gingrich, Ted “Crystal Meth With a Manwhore” Haggard, and I think Strom Thurmond even had a black baby! (That’s how vital this issue is…it suspends racism!)

As the great philosopher Bertrand Russell once said, “To fear love is to fear life, and those who fear life are already three parts dead.” And since Russell reportedly had affairs with a long line of women, we can assume he concluded with, “And I’ll meet you at your place at 11.”

If you’re like me and stuck in a sexless marriage then I have found the perfect solution for you!

The other day I found this funny ass video on youtube titled “Ashley Madison.com Banned US Super Bowl commercial”.   Check it out!  The tag line is “Life is short… have an affair!”  Yup…I said it; an actual business that hooks married people up for some naughty time.  I, of course thought, “Hmmm…that can’t be real” so I felt compelled to do a little research of my own (grin!)  So, I went to their site and joined their free service (although once you see what they offer, you will want to pay for the whole shabang!)

I am not joking when I say I was pleasantly surprised to find out that not only can you indeed sign up for an affair, but they also offer you a money back guarantee.  That’s right guys, a money back guarantee!  When was the last time you were guaranteed to get laid in the next three months?  Yeah…a whole lot of never!! Check it out! I did and now I am just one of the millions of members spread out over all 50 states looking to just hook up, with no strings attached and no suspicious wife.

By  John Michaels

Many people get very hung up on cheating, yet we all can be found guilty of it in some way shape or form. And while I wouldn’t personally carry on an extra marital affair, I’ve been a part of one…or two. In my freshman year of college, I was lucky enough to be in the hallway of my parent’s apartment building smoking  a cigarette with my neighbor. Recently separated (but still married) she was drunk off her ass, and I figured “what the hell I’ll hit this cougar and ad her to the resume.” after an initial leap of faith, and some fooling around in the stairwell I found myself in an eight month on and off strictly booty-call affair. It was great while it lasted, and eventually I put an end to it. It isn’t always this easy though. So why do people cheat, and more importantly what are the signs?

People cheat for a number of a different reasons. Some do it for power, some do it for freedom. Others will try to fill a void that isn’t otherwise being filled in more ways than one. Having been through the fun personal experience of getting cheated on, I can walk you through the red-flags and warning signs that it might be coming up in your relationship. So be on the lookout for:

- A drastic change that you knew nothing about, and worse yet your input doesn’t matter. If your girl goes from black hair and constantly wearing a pony tail  to blonde with a perm one day and doesn’t come home all excited about what you think of the procedure, you can bet she probably did it at someone else’s request.

-Since you’ve been married she’s always had grass on the field. If all of a sudden one day she’s sporting a smooth landing strip under her panties, you bet someone else is landing their 747 on that strip.

- A great relationship is built on trust. If you start to notice a fluctuation in yours get out. After two years of you and her occasionally doing your own thing alone or with friends, if he or she starts telling you where they are going and explaining you don’t need to worry, well you need to worry.

-         When the phone starts ringing all hours of the night you might want to raise a question about who these calls are coming from/going to. If you also notice she’s locking her phone, don’t make an issue out of it, but keep a mental note. If it keeps happening, inquire again in about a week and check to see if you get a different answer.

- If for five years she’s been working 9-4 and all of a sudden she’s working late, when they never have is usually a sign not of cheating, but that something in the relationship just isn’t right.

-         Be on the lookout for out of the blue gestures designed to do more than just surprise you with a profession of their love. Expensive things one right after the other (that aren’t usual in the relationship) might be a sign of someone trying to cover up guilt.

-         Trust your instincts. If you think something is wrong, it’s worth it to talk about it right then and there in a normal calm manner. Don’t accuse, but mention a tenseness or a drift.

Like dents in a car, you can fix slight cracks in most relationships simply by banging them out.